Twisted stars

2009-10-14T08:59:00.000-07:00

School has been a blast, even though every morning I had every temptation to skip school.

As I'm typing here, I can already hear Pradeep's sarcastic remark, like the one he gave me in school earlier. Just cos I only had one pathetic line in my post for the last 5 hours of school. Shut up Pradeep!

I think it is sucha pity that people won't be able to enjoy the spirit of Hari Raya just because time flies real fast, like full speed fast. Where's the joy?

But on the contrary I feel otherwise. Visting have been great so far, even if the end is near, there's still some time left to enjoy. The only glitch is, I spent all my collection.

Didn't I told you visiting was a blast? And probably, this will be my first and last time posting alot of photos in a post.

Better meet my girls soon, what's the point of moving in the neighbourhood if we don't!

I refuse to believe Taylor Lautner is 17. I see Shark Boy with chocolate abs and pearly white teeth whenever I see that boy. And Bieber gotta stop casting old-looking, not so nice chicks in his MVs. Cos he deserves better, just saying.

2009-09-16T01:19:00.000-07:00

I had too much dose of Harry Potter for two consecutive weeks. Now I felt like Hogwarts do exists, bummer. I need to transfer my attention to other books before I get carried away (lol)

I hate it when my mood doesn't improves.

Yoobin (leopard top) has killer/thunder thighs.

2009-09-14T01:40:00.000-07:00

You gotta love how RZ teases other Chelsea fans, Liverpool fans and Barcelona fans. Since he's a Man United fan, I can understand where he is coming from. Damn funny, I tell you.

Love my new hair colour (lol)

I read the last series of Harry Potter twice just cos I loved it. JK Rowling is a genius, did I mentioned that? Now that the tales of Harry Potter have ended, I know I'm gonna miss it, I hope another author writes books like this in near future.

Oh wait, I forgot about Stephenie Meyer.

2009-09-09T09:30:00.000-07:00

Jay's gone, GD's accused of plagiarism, Hyun Joong is down with H1N1 and JaeChunSu's hearing is approaching soon. So what's next? I really hope things will get better for all. Never under estimate the power of words. It could kill someone, word.

Books are one of the many things I consider as precious.

BBQ Chicken was awesome. Today's outing was almost full house but I bet all of us had great fun spending time together. Considering the fact that we haven't seen each other for quite awhile, today was definitely worth it. Since Syaza posted the nice photos, I shall post the not-so-nice ones then. Next outing, Hans River anyone?

You know what else was worth it? Syaza making a fool of herself whilst Fiza and I had a good laugh at her. We almost rolled on the floor laughing, word.

2009-08-23T08:30:00.000-07:00

Haven't recovered from Changmin's Aroooohaaa.
Only he can commit sucha cute crime.
And get away with it easily.
♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

One whole month of training during fasting season, sounds good to me. However, I'm not sure if I can handle 4 Saturdays of match, 2 games per day. First match down, three more to go. It was a great challenge for me. Thankfully, I was able to sleep my fatigue/thirst away. Must be the hardest fasting month to date.

[Yoochun]
Seaside, that's right!
People love each other, take a ride.
Hot girl, please don't take off.
Bring your make up, move your hot butt.
Yeah

Dayum! Gotta love the way he rapped your hot butt, emphasis on your was epic. And yes, Changmin's Aroooohaaa still gets me all the time. What can be more chaotic than 23 boys singing about girl pink bikini and whizzing whizzing of cars?

Semester break starts on the 26th, happy fasting!

xoxo

2009-08-19T06:45:00.000-07:00

Honestly, I'm pretty upset right now and I surprised myself by getting upset over such a stupid, silly thing. But anyway, I don't stay upset for a long time. So I guess I'm over it.

Haha sucha pointless paragraph.

Here are the things I gained from yesterday's training:

Two visible bruises on my right thigh
Stiff shoulders and neck only
I love diving
Whatever happens on the field, stays on he field
Never drink too much water during water breaks

I've got so many things to look forward to. There's Ramadhan, under 18 league, semester break and tutoring. Most importantly, I've got to start packing as it seemed that Mama took advantage of my holidays to order me around lol! I know it sounds weird to look forward to half the things I've mentioned.

It's official, Ken annoys the shit out of me. I've never liked him since Singapore Idol season 1 though, I just need to make it official. Except for the gag show during auditions, I don't know why I still continue to watch it. I should have stopped nong nong ago.

xoxo

2009-08-17T12:03:00.000-07:00

My suspicions were right afterall, oh the horror.

Now that my doubts were confirmed, I felt that I should not have seek the truth. I decided that it would be better if I were curious and doubting but I only had to realise it after the whole discovery. Good job. I hope I will never have to face her, ever again. Not that it mattered to me but just by knowing her presence, makes me sick. I'm not sure how I'm going to react to this, or maybe I'm just overreacting. Considering that the past is the very reason for the future, then perhaps I have every damn right to overreact.

I need some Avril Lavigne to cast all these negative vibes away.

You know what suddenly, my feelings changed. I don't feel upset anymore. The thing is, I don't know what I'm feeling. I prefer it this way then. Less worry, lesser thoughts. I need sleep, yeah that's exactly what I need right now. Upcoming League this Saturday (first day of Ramadhan) I'm not ready for a league!

P.S You both deserve each other

xoxo

2009-07-15T19:25:00.000-07:00

Faci: You should choose the leader at the start of the day, not the end
Dudu: We cannot make up our mind cos we don't have enough cosmetics

Me: You must take note of the properties before you send me
Dudu: (Took out $10 note)

Shima: Issit polar or non-polar?
Dudu: I'm bear

Duliang (Dudu) is an epic failure when it comes to jokes.

Rocking the hairstyle!

2009-07-04T09:53:00.000-07:00

Haha.

AYG was great just cos I get to meet cute Singapore basketball players, good looking Bahrain and Oman athletes. I met some Japanese ones too. Other than that, it's history. I hope these athletes are having a great time here despite the flu outbreak and Singapore's warm weather.

With MJ's death, the whole world is giving tributes to him. But I'm disappointed about unfortunate issues arising after his death. The man needs to rest in peace. And with his music videos and songs playing countless of times, we start to appreciate him after his gone right? I personally love Heal The World, the only MJ song I listen to since DBSK did the cover with BoA.

If ever Megan Fox's fantasy of dating Rain comes true, I wonder how Clouds are going to react. No worst, what the infamous Netizens think about it. And no, I don't even know how I will react cos I can't picture it in my mind. People might think Rain is dumb enough to reject Megan but hey, whatever float their boats. I'm thinking Rain is a true Korean man. Hollywood has tons of good looking, great bodies men and she just had to hit on Rain? Well yeah, whatever floats your boat Megan.

2009-06-13T09:37:00.000-07:00

Seeing him out of the field and without his jersey, he still looks yummy! And btw, I haven't got over the fact about him transferring to Real Madrid. I mean I have nothing against Real Madrid. He got mad skills and he's really doing well in The Red Devils. So indeed, money does make the wolrd go round tsktsk!

I'm very positive Syahidah will be flipping out about this too, we're Cristiano Ronaldo fans.

I wish the boys will end their tour soon cos I miss them. Plus with Tokyo Dome just around the corner, I hope they'll do a smashing comeback in Korea. No offence but when I heard Big Bang's going to Tokyo Dome too, I was upset. I mean I have nothing against Big Bang (haha) However I concluded that it doesn't really matter. It's really YG's business if they wants Big Bang to enter Japan's music industry. Still, I wish them success.

And it looks like someone needs to learn how to start saving soon.

2009-06-08T11:11:00.000-07:00

The cup noodle & can are so unglam!

Holiday or not, my alarm clock still rings at 6.30 in the morning. With the whole Asian Youth Games coming up, it will be a little bit busy with facilitating training. And I think I just wasted 4 precious hours of sleep for this briefing. Well considering I slept through the briefing, make that 3 hours then. It felt weird to be surrounded by secondary students in their uniforms while RP students were dressed in home clothes haha.

Thank God there's Rahmat the whole time. Went for abit of shopping at Marina Square and headed home. Since the kids spent their day upstairs, I bought them some donuts. You should see the look on Masyiita's face when she's munching on her donut. Hilarious much?

My stomach hurts and I keep burping gas. I hope I have enough time to stick my ass on the toilet bowl when mother nature calls. It must be the dinner I ate or the $5.70 Nasi Ayam Penyet I had for lunch. Speaking of which, I am never coming back to Raffles City for lunch/dinner.

Qistina is experiencing the Angus virus. Ever since I introduced Angus, Thongs and Perfect Snogging to her, she can't stop watching. But here's the worst part, she's trying with all her might to speak the British accent. I hope she realised that Pure Malay, is running in her blood.

Syaza's chikopek guy

2009-06-06T00:25:00.000-07:00

HAPPY 38th BIRTHDAY MAMA!

Double happiness for me cos two of my loved ones are celebrating their birthday this week. Well I planned a little surprise for Mama. The necessary stuffs we ready and you can't imagine how nervous we got as we await her arrival at home. The slightest movement we heard from the front door, we raced to the door and checked whether she's arriving. And we refers to me, Qistina and the kids. It was sucha funny sight!

Balloons were filled at the entrance and the kids were getting ready to blow the horns as soon as she enters. Trust me, we scared the hell outta her! Of course, she looked happy and surprised. She thanked us for the wonderful surprise and we're off to catch Monsters vs Aliens.

And in the cinema, Masyiita can't stop eating the popcorn. In the end, she had to sit on my lap throughout the whole movie. Believe me or not, she even insisted of going out of the cinema during the movie. I'm lucky my mood was not swinging the wrong way.

So my Mom turned striving 38 this year and yet, she's still mistaken as my sister. Upsetting or what?

2009-06-04T11:01:00.000-07:00

Happy 23rd Birthday Baby!

Well I'm gonna save my tattles about this man for today. Just know that as much as Syaza Nur is head over heels for Mr Choi, I feel the same way for this man. Saranghaeyo, Park Yoochun!

I'm feeling very emotional right now and I can't stop crying at the smallest issue. And the irony is that I feel good about it. Instead of blaming Ms Red for it, I think I'm thankful. Cos when time doesn't permits you to show your weakest spot, this is the time to let loose.

Mama and Papa went to school for course briefing, they're really flipping out. I think the briefing brainwashed their minds to diminish any opportunities for me to cut class, wear slippers to school and score badly for my Daily Grade. There's more advises about my GPA. It's scary. I'm only in Year One, goodness gracious.

While I can't help myself from looking at Aaron Johnson every night before turning in, I think I need a dosage of Shia Labeouf (okay no link whatsoever) I'm anticipating Transformers 2 and it's a must to catch it in the cinema, although I still can't get over him kissing Ms Megan Fox on the first one. Trust me, the girls in my class haven't as well.

Next week will be packed with training and more events! I hope there's time for class outing though. AYG trial session is coming up and so is the 5th Singapore National Swimming Championships. Do you know the meaning of this? (guess people, guess) Now I just wish I can snuggle Syaza in too!

2009-05-23T11:18:00.000-07:00

I'm tired, really really tired :(

2009-05-18T08:12:00.000-07:00

Old house SOLD. New house BOUGHT.

I had Rugby Clinic on Saturday morning which was awesome! But here's the glitch, the aftermath was horrible. Imagine 1 pathetic year of non-exercise activities and you suddenly play rugby? Yeah, you get my drift. From head to toe, not one part isn't sore (okay exaggerate a little) Well I guess it's worth it cos it helps prepare for Touch trials. And now I can't even go down or up two flight of stairs without my muscles contracting so badly. Help!

Irregular sleep will affect me sooner/later.

Finally, mission accomplished! I guess it's all a matter of coincidence. On my way home, I saw Irsyad. Omg it's so good to see him. Nothing feels better than getting to meet an old mate huh? I hope to see more of him in school though.

Speaking of coincidence,
haha I'll be shifting to Tampines St 33

Maknae <3

2009-05-11T08:46:00.000-07:00

Omg somebody please get me a plane and fly me to Korea! It's just too sinful to look at. And imagine the taste okay people. Idk why he's sucha Mama's boy but he franchised a Gelato Ice Cream Cafe for his Mama (like he said he would in 2008) Can you say awesome? I feel like gobling that whole bucket of Gelato on my mouth, possible right. Yoochun baby must be really good in spending his kachingkaching that he earned from both Korea and Japan. Well well, enjoying life baby?

And yes here's a bonus picture for readers
I wanna put her in my pocket

2009-05-10T09:39:00.000-07:00

Friday Night

We went studying at Macdonalds. Well actually we excludes me cos these two were the morons studying hard. I went bonkers just by looking at them burying their heads in their Mathematics books. Oh the horror! Stayed till 5am the next day as we dragged our feet to Syaza's place and finally, on her Queen size bed. Despite the fatigue we encountered, the best thing of all was Adik not barging in the room while we're dreaming of our Prince Charming.

Seoul Garden was awesome btw!

And now, he's telling me to turn in cos while all Primary, Secondary and JC students will be enjoying their holiday tomorrow, I on the other hand have school to attend. Sweet dreams!

2009-05-07T10:25:00.000-07:00

I don't need fancy words nor adjectives to express my affection towards her. Only God knows how much I appreciate her being part of my life. And for that, I thank you for being the one. Please behave yourself now that you're officially legal. I wish you all the deserved happiness in the world baby.

Happy 18th Birthday, Syaza Nur!

(right Girl? And sorry for the ugly picture)

2009-05-06T09:38:00.000-07:00

I'm sick, hate the feeling.

You know how I've always hated Science right? So it feels like my body knows and it decided to get sick today during Science module. I swear I was in so much pain that I had to bend down most of the time. Being the ignorant me when I'm in pain, I just lay my head on the table. During Meeting 2 I called Papa to fetch me home. Helped my team mates kick start the Powerpoint slides and off I went home when James left the class. And just when I thought I will get better, I'm having a splitting headache!

Week 2 Daily Grade

2009-05-05T09:05:00.000-07:00

Junsu looked so sad.

Please get well soon Oppa!

I love Team 5 of Mathematics module (yes including him, or maybe not)
Happy 18th Birthday, Afiqah darling!
Aqilah is a major clumsy burger
Reflection Journal is an unnecessary chore that unfortunately contributes to my Daily Grade
It's scary sometimes how the world is incredibly small

Fran Drescher is a genius and I totally adore her! The Nanny is a very addictive show plus it's plain hilarious. She's got that rocking body and her trademark of course, her nasal high-pitched voice. Go Franny!

2009-05-02T10:15:00.000-07:00

Received my calender and guess who is featured on month of May :D

Didn't attend Selection cos I overslept (sigh)

Now that ~~Swine Flu~~ Infuenza A (H1N1) Infection is going on, there will be alot of changes regarding the school entrance to class. Firstly, thermometer is a must from Monday onwards as failure to bring will be fined. Secondly, now Year 1 students have to register at South Agora before we are able to proceed to class due to Door Controls at Level 1 and Level 3. That means no more walking up the ramp or crossing the lawn. Wow the precautions RP is taking to ensure minimal contagious of the infection.

Spent $300 today and I'm guilty
Once I reached home, I walked to Mama's room and gave her my card. Papa entered and I dare not look at his eyes. As expected, he was mad. Like mad, mad. The mad when you just stare and let your eyes speak? Yeah, that mad. On the contrary, Mama was as calm as the sea. I just showed her the things I bought, she smiled and told me to keep my shopping bag. And right now, Papa's not talking to me. I've yet to apologise, maybe when he has cool down abit. P.S Thanks Kak Ana for being my date today1

Yesterday there was Holiday Movie on Central which has exactly the same plot as Main Hoon
Na. I get irritated but I did watched it till the end. And thanks to it, I'm watching Main Hoon Na before turning in. You know, seeing Shah Rukh Khan before going to bed will chase the bed bugs away. Some eye candy like him is worth the 3hrs of my sleeping time. Goodnight folks.

Somebody's birthday is coming eh (kening naik-naik)

2009-05-01T11:11:00.000-07:00

Me: Guess who I saw yesterday?
Cousin: Who?
Me: I saw insertsname at Woodlands inter yesterday.
Mama: Then what did you do?
Me: I pretend I didn't see.
Mama: Very good, that's my baby.
Me&Cousin: (laughs)
Mama: That's the right thing to do.

I feel like slapping my own face(!) How's Labour Day everyone? Anyway 1st of May welcomed me with backaches and bloody cramps, wow thanks a bunch. On the contrary, the family spent a great time together. Family movie marathon is a must when we're having gatherings. You don't have to be in the theater to enjoy movies. Went for shopping at Expo before heading to Aunt's place. I hated Metro Sale cos it was boring, except for the snack section.

Selection at Yishun Safra tomorrow! (major pressure)

Did I mention that Week 2 modules were like fcuk? Right enough, I scored B's for Mathematics and Science. Well atleast I tired my best. I know I did and so were the rest of my team mates cos we were squeezing our brains for the modules. Well Mr. James caught me in MSN during Science haha but it's okay he's nice though the whole class dislikes him.

I feel sorry for RP cos they have to cater to alot of students. But it is their responsibility afterall. It seems like students are complaining about the overcrowded foodcourt (hell yeah!) And the frequency of buses to school is also an issue. Haha it's funny how all Year 1 students are walking from interchange to school every morning. It's like a company of army going for war!

2009-04-30T05:17:00.000-07:00

2nd week of school was terrible cos the modules were fcuk like that. But I'm lucky to have this two girls to accompany me while I forget about the hideous week I had. Thank you (in every language possible) Sorry for the low quality photo, Coffee Bean lacks brighter lights.

Before anybody accuses me of bubble and stealing my Micky,
please be reminded that he's TAKEN okay!

2009-04-28T09:06:00.000-07:00

Look how grown up is this little maknae! Time flies really fast, it seems just like yesterday he was dancing to Replay with his fresh cuteness. Now he has this manly aura written all over him. I think I just realised that I have this fetish for maknaes (read: Changmin)

But no worries, Park Yoochun stays in my heart and will not leave.
Fandom does wonders.

Tabitha painted a heart on my nail and now it looked disturbingly pretty. Presentation went smoothly, not what I expected cos I panicked about our unfinished slides 10 minutes before Meeting 3. And I'm sorry I have to say this but J.T I dislike you. To the extent that I always want to act disrespectful towards you. Technically you deserve it cos you know, you've got to earn it before others can start repecting you. Which in my opinion, you fail miserably. Seriously, some try hard to kiss up to others but you try hard to shun others away from you.

2009-04-27T16:46:00.000-07:00

Time check: 7.46am

For someone who is definitely not a morning riser like me, reaching school at this time is a miracle. Cos something I have learned is that I have to avoid the morning crowd no matter what! And thank God, I managed to do it this morning. Am I a happy girl or what?

Monday = Mathematics
(What a subject to start the week)

Anyway, Fahmi texted me on Saturday. Seems like he's enjoying school as well. Don't worry, once your classmates know what an ass you are, they will be the one making friends with you. Haha! Kak Lynna planned a gathering for Labour Day. I hope I can make it just cos I miss my working peeps.

Changmin paid me a visit last night,
I think he heard my wish!

2009-04-26T08:52:00.000-07:00

School's awesome!

I've been doing well in Daily Grade. 3A's for 3 modules so far but I'm hoping I can maintain my conduct in class. After a whole year of missing school, I suddenly felt the competition to achieve good grades. Cos the word GPA itself, scares me. I admit I once looked down on the very school I'm in right now. But trust me, scoring a good GPA here is as difficult as scoring in any other polytechnics. So cheers to good grades!

Even though my patience is running thin, I see no point in wasting my time to rant about this here. Cos honestly, I don't know exactly what is she thinking. The most saddest thing is I as a sister could not do anything about her. If only she knows what she's turning into. Or perhaps she's just too young to realize and this is the process of growing up.

P.S I hope Changmin enters my dream tonight

2009-04-20T09:14:00.000-07:00

Labin fooling around!

Attempt 1

Attempt 2

DSLM 3 :D

I'm pretty tied down by school so I'll be back with updates.
Mission: Bump into Irsyad in school(!)

2009-04-16T07:51:00.000-07:00

Ocher: An earthy and often impure iron ore used as a pigment
Yellow Ocher: The flag/home base colour for Republic's SHL (School of Sports, Health & Leisure)

Day One Orientation
Displeasingly boring. I bet even my SLs (Student Leader) were discouraged by my group cos they were so un-enthu. I tried to gather everyone but the boys were being ignorant. Lamest thing was, me being voted for Team Leader.

Day Two Orientation
Mud/Hafiz betrayed us by leading another group. But Labin's group joined us for the games and other activities (don't ask me why his name is Labin) Zul taught us the SHL War Cry dance which was interesting. Highlight of the day was tug-of-war. SHL is one step away from winning the Principal's Cup. Our tug-of-war team was awesome! Well finally DSLM 3 bonded and our favourite game, 007(!)

Tomorrow is Day Three and also our allocation of classes. I just checked out the list of my classmates and I was disappointed, idk why. My class is located at the SEVENTH floor! As if reporting to school at 8.30 every morning isn't bad enough.

School aside now.

Mama made a revelation that the agency is inviting viewers over. Which means we need to do some serious cleaning of the house. I hope the next family will love this house cos it served my family for 5 years already, full of memories. I'm not really fond of the idea of shifting houses, the hassle is over the top. Plus my heart wishes to stay.

2009-04-14T03:02:00.000-07:00

I miss my boys, really.

This is it, tomorrow is the day. Am I nervous or what?

Handling toddlers can be really tiring. Cos all they talk about is why, why and why! They're curious about everything. Why the bird is scared? Why are we going there? Why cannot press the bell? Why there's a camera? I mean I know they're growing up and stuff but sometimes, they just talk too much.

My favourite baby(s) including M&I too

2009-04-08T08:23:00.000-07:00

M: Kakak Dada, I want water (waving the empty bottle)
Me: Okay later, five minutes (watching FO on laptop)
M: I want water now (whinning times 10 nyer!)
Me: Later I take for you lah!
M: (knocks my head with the bottle)

I: (toying with my keyboard)
Me: Stop playing and come out skarang!
I: (ignores and keep playing)
Me: If you don't stop, I won't cook for you today
I: (runs out of the room immediately)

Meet M(Masyiita) and I(Idris)

They were so fascinated by the webcam, they had to stare straight into the camera. This is one of the best ways to shut them up when they're annoying, take photographs. Toddlers, they can even fight over one plastic fork and sausages! I had my rest when both slept after a whole day of play.

The past week has been crazy and school's starting.

2009-04-03T06:07:00.000-07:00

Qistina had her first floorball match in school on Monday. Since it's her first, she kindly asked me to witness her play. I was really impress by her conduct during the match and can I say Pasir Ris Primary owned! I was cheering for her, together with Naila and Syaza but yet, she told me off for shouting too loud (claiming that I embarrased her) Anyway, she totally ignored us until the match ended, so yeah.

This two toddlers kept me busy the whole week as I had to babysit them. Speaking of babysitting, I was at Changi for early lunch and a nyonya mistook me for a mother of three(!) Do I look like I'm freaking married? Let alone bear three, THREE kids.

For the first time in many days/months I woke up at 6 in the morning. Well it is time for me to get my sleeping schedule right cos school's starting and I hate to imagine the bus ride to Woodlands from Pasir Ris. Oh the horror! I can't stand everytime Muhd reminds me not to be late when fetching him.

It's over for Boys Before Flowers. I've long accepted the fact that Ji Hoo won't be with Jandi but I like the relationship between them. I never liked Goo Jun Pyo's character but he pleased me during the last two episodes. Seriously, the PD should have get Ji Hoo a nice girl. And I hope there's a season two to this (although I doubt it) cos 25 episodes of F4 is insufficient, really.

2009-03-28T23:29:00.000-07:00

1N2D
SUCCESSFUL

If you minus of the jerks who threw peanuts at us and the annoying oh-I-owned-my-girlfriend bastard, SevenPlusOne's Chalet was perfect. I hope there will be more outings where all 8 of us is present. Cos happy occasions like this make me feel gratified.

And yesterday I had the weirdest dreams ever (or maybe not) Serious shit, it felt like I just had episodes of mini-drama playing in my head. I was upset at my ignorant Mother for not anticipating Earth Hour. Apparently I was sleeping so yeah.

Haha okay I just felt like laughing.

Even though I've wished him personally, Happy 18th Birthday Dzul! And I'm used to you teasing me about my birthday so whatever haha. Another person that I should congratulate is Fahmi. Congrats for getting into Poly, after waiting for Idk how many months. I bet they had no choice but to accept you after seeing your freakingly long appeal email.

Kalau kamu genggam pasir lama-lama, pasir itu akan hilang.

P.S Girl, please tell Adek to stop freaking me out cos this is NOT the first time. And you know how I once felt for Adek right?! So I cannot handle this anymore lah.

2009-03-20T14:03:00.000-07:00

I don't normally post half-naked boys photos here, I guess this is an exceptional? Go guess his age! Haha I'm not sure if Naila/Syaza knows him. But I like him (partly cos I see TOP when I see him)

2009-03-19T06:30:00.000-07:00

It's not that I don't care but I prefer to let this matter rest. Until the girls don't talk it out, I will no longer bother to raise the problem(?) anymore. Cos eventually I get tired of it.

Thanks to K-Nite I'm hooked to Marilah Kemari.

Marilah kemari
Hey Hey Hey Hey
Hey kawan
Akulah disini
Hey Hey Hey Hey
Hey kasih
Mari bergembira bersama-sama
Hilangkan hati duka lara

Marilah kemari
Hey Hey Hey Hey
Hey kawan
Dan kini menari
Hey Hey Hey Hey
Hey kasih
Mari bergembira bersama-sama
Hilangkan hati duka lara

Boleh dua-duaan
Asal tetap di lingkaran
Tapi awas jangan pergi berduaan
Nenek bilang itu berbahaya

2009-03-18T16:07:00.001-07:00

The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus, 10/03/2009

AWESOME, RJA KICKED ASS!

2009-03-08T14:00:00.000-07:00

I've got tickets to the concert, and Diana is going all I-love-you on me.

Our plans for chalet was successful. I've got to head down to Costa Sands for booking. And Mama offered to help us with the food. I can't wait for our very own 2 Days and 1 night. The next thing I need is all the girls to be present. Or else when's the next time we get to spend time together.

I've not been using Max for two days, and I miss him already. So I checked out a few scores on the internet. I realised that I've got much more to learn. If only Yoochun could give me some tips on how he taught himself to play. Maybe I should video call him.

So Sunny committed suicide due to depression. Issit just me or alot of suicides are happening around the world. It scares me especially the NUS undergraduate guy. Not only foreign talents are suffering cos of studies, the locals are having our share of difficulties too.

To whom it may concern, RIP

March Camp stars next week.

2009-03-03T09:19:00.000-08:00

Fahmi: What have you learned after working for almost a year?
Me: You guys are jerks!

And I have a perfect explanation for that. The boys tied me to the chair, literally. Both my hands were tied on the arm rest of the chair. They wrapped my face with toilet roll, toilet roll people! Cut strips of string and dump it in my hoodie. Chop my hands and legs (as in the customized chop) It was horrible, really. Last day of work equals to torment.

School's starting and I'm excited (I think)

I have a new member in the family. Well at least I think he is family, considering he will be with me for as long as I live. Which I hope so. Haha I'm so excited. Oh anyway, his name is Max. Why Max you may ask, I have no idea!

2009-02-26T03:52:00.000-08:00

Dear Peter,

I'm not having a bad day. It just happened that I thought of you today. I really hate what you've become. Or was it the real you all along? I promise this won't happen again. But I miss you for today, terribly. I wish you happiness, wherever you are.

2009-02-20T06:11:00.000-08:00

Recession is a period of general economic decline. Specifically, a decline in GDP for two or more consecutive quarters.
credits: investorsword.com

Carmen/caprishiqi from SINGAPORE-TVXQ went to Korea for DBSK's 3rd Asia Mirotic Concert (crying out loud)
I'm going for The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus's concert. So I'm eagerly waiting for Feb's pay and I'm off to Tickets.com for the tickets! Issit me or it's the concert wave right now? I signed my petition for RedStar, and hoping to hear from them about the concert in KL soon.

I'm saving for a keyboard since the piano is painfully expensive! It always feels good to buy something with your own money, doesn't it? Piano lessons are tough, especially when I'm struggling with new songs. Plus my wrist hurts after each lesson haha.

Title for today's post should be 'Contradict' (if you know what I mean)

Just cos I miss them girls!

Can I ever leave him out?

If you must agree, TOP is good looking. And the worst part is, he reminds me of someone I know!

2009-02-13T03:49:00.000-08:00

I had to back track almost 50 pages of soompi!

Okay here's the thing. I've been laughing my heads off when Amy was translating Mirotic Chinese version. And I'm deprive of the boys, big time. Worst still, I've got to rush home now, like pronto!

2009-02-04T09:12:00.000-08:00

In times of my fragile moments, the brain slowly loses a large amount of cells to think positive. This ordeal won't end. It seems like a joke, a serious joke. As if adding insult to the wound, they do whatever they wish to. Leaving me and my little kin at the edge of our own seats.

If only they could see through the eyes of their two daugthers.

I've been through this path and I dislike it so much that my heart turned into stone. As hard as stone. But being a girl taught me about feelings, and I'm glad that I still have that light from beneath the darkness. Else, I would have pack my stuff and walk away a long time ago. Every teenager has his/her tinge of rebel in them. It just needs something to trigger it off.

I'm having weight issues here, I'm sucha sad thing.

Female: I don't feel like sleeping with you tonight (locks the door)
Male: Whatever, I'll sleep outside

2009-01-31T10:43:00.000-08:00

Blogger templates kickass!

I'm extremely thankful for the support that was given to me while I'm going through this phase of life. This phase of life where I have to juggle family, friends, work and studies (I sound like a married woman!) Seriously I think 2008 was the most challenging and tiring year. Anyway, I had the support that I needed. Nothing felt better than being surrounded with encouraging words and happy faces cheering me on. Thank you loves!

My Cinta-Fitri-syndrome was on high alert. Cinta Fitri marathon was great as always. But this time, I couldn't stand the evil/mushy/cheesy parts. That's why I had to fast forward those scenes. This drama reminds me of the good and the bad that existed in the world.

The tables have turned, again. Idk what's worst. Having seperated parents or parents who live in the same house but doesn't feel each other's presence. It's fucking frustrating. Sometimes it's too personal, I don't know where else to turn to. The only reason I stand this shit is Qisitina. And the fact that I realise my actions in the house have effects on others, unlike them.

My precious men, put a smile on my face please.

2009-01-19T09:56:00.000-08:00

To my cantankerous, concerned and sensitive father,
Happy 41st Birthday!

Omg, look at his wrinkles. We went to BBQ Chicken to celebrate Papa's birthday. Being the sincerely good daughter, I paid the bill. Plus it's Papa's birthday and the fact that he didn't get to celebrate his birthday last year cos it slipped my mind. (bad girl I know) Anyway since Qistina and I were at home, we decided to give him a little surprise. Well the surprise was we hid in the toilet and when he enters the room as always, we will suddenly appear out of the toilet and sing him a birthday song. Haha I know, brilliant right? For a 11 year old kid that is, it was totally Qistina's idea. For once, I decided to go with it.

I get stomach butterfiles just thinking about my JAE results. What's odd was Mama being more nervous than I am. Okay maybe not that odd, considering that I haven't been schooling for a year. It's common sense, yes?

Oh my intelligent sister accidentally stepped on the main switch for the telly, causing us to suffer without it for two nights now. Now this is odd, how can she NOT see the bloody switch while walking AT HOME? To make matters worst, iTunes totally screwed up and all my videos, songs were deleted from my iPod. Great. My lappy is in a mess now, it needs serious organization.

Putting that aside. Since I've time now that I'm working lesser days, I'm thinking of writing fan-fictions. Not those kind where two guys start to date while confessing their love etc, I totally hate that stuff. Gonna give it some more thought.

P.S Syaza and Naila, if I write about Suju then will you read them? :D

Go Chunnie, work that high note!

2009-01-17T08:46:00.000-08:00

Thanks eh Syaza!

Rules must be followed:
Each blogger must post this rules.
Each blogger must start with ten random facts about themselves.
Bloggers that are tagged need to write about their own blog, ten things and post this rules. Don't forget to leave them comments telling them they have been tagged and are to read your blog.

I like to mess up my room pretty bad.
Having lots of perfumes has been a recent habit.
I've got fetish for sneakers.
I suck at Math, big time.
My favourite thing in the world is my smelly bolster.
I have a red umbrella.
Micky's photo is pasted on my ez-link.
I have an annoying hole in my wallet, literally.
I wear a ring on my right pinky finger.
I love midnight snacks.

Who's the person that tagged you? Ans: WonderSyaz (haha)
Relationship between you and him/her? Ans: Girlfriend till the end!
Three impressions of him/her? Ans: Easy-going, neutral, blessed with fortune (haha)
If he/she becomes your enemy, you will? Ans: Win her heart back
What will you say to the person you like very much? Ans: Oppa, (stares at his face)
Characteristic I like about myself? Ans: Seeing things at a bigger perspective
Characteristic I hate about myself? Ans: I'm lazy, I procrastinate
For the person whom you hate, you say? Ans: I don't hate, I dislike
What do people feel about you? Ans: Whatever they want to
Your crush? Ans: The guy who used to work at Cathay E!hub
~~Pass this to~~ List 10 people: Ans: Nina, Naila, Syaza, Nadhirah, Fahmi, Amy, Fiza, Sasriezah, Durrah, Zhong (haha felt like changing)
If 5 & 7 were together? Ans: Haha they won't last a week
Who does 5 like? Ans: A girl, whose name starts with a R and ends with L!
What colour does 9 like? Ans: Idk haha! More like I forget
Say something about 8? Ans: She's independant (just like me heh)
Who is 2? Ans: Girlfriend till the end!
Talk about 3. Ans: The glue that sticks us together (self-explanatory)
Who is 10's best friend? Ans: Felicia haha! More like special friend
Who's the sexiest among all 10? Ans: Definitely Durrah!
What colour does 4 like? Ans: She used to like pink though
Is 4 single? Ans: Nope
Your relationship with 1. Ans: My guilty pleasure (haha)
Are 5 & 6 best friends? Ans: Colleagues who always argue!
9's surname? Ans: Mokhtar (surname is something like father's name right haha)
7's nickname? Ans: Fizabeylo
Say something to 8. Ans: *gropes* (haha no need words, just actions)
Say something to help 9. Ans: Eh totai, wake up! (this will help her answer peoples' calls that she rejected)
Who do I admire? Ans: Francine Joy Drescher, great body, hilarious and overcome cancer and her raping trauma
Where does 1 live? Ans: Tampines
10 of them know who you like? Ans: Nope, only 6 of them
Say something to 6 when you see her. Ans: How's the office?
10's spouse? Ans: Haha already has one, just kidding

After School debuted today aka Korea's PCD. Firstly, they're far from PCD. Secondly, they don't have what it takes to be PCD. Just my two cents, but seriously. I was anticipating them at first. Maybe it's too early to judge but I get tired of them easily. Dance wise, they're good. Only that Park Ga Hee seems like she's trying too hard to impress. Though I would like her if she just flow with natural. (Totally ignoring the fact that she used to date Yoochun) Vocals wise, they're lacking. Catchy songs but I get tired of it, except for Playgirlz.

I fell in love with staying at home. My companion, the laptop and of course the television haha. Nothing beats the pleasure of spending time with oneself without any disturbance. There's the kitchen for food, laptop for entertainment and the holy bed for taking naps. I better catch some sleep. Tomorrow there's tables to clean at a wedding. It's gonna be a long long day, just pray that I don't get cranky. Cos the backaches and cramps have just begun.

2009-01-15T07:33:00.000-08:00

My cantankerous, concerned father ask me to audition for Singapore Idol.

I tested Qistina's spelling and dictation earlier. Which reminds me how school is really like. I've been working for a long time, I thought I missed school. Well I guess when school starts, I'm gonna miss having money banked into my account and spending it haha. Speaking of work, my break is nearly over which means money money money! (aka back to office)

Eh there's no chewing/bubble gum in Singapore right? Gum is made entirely from food additives. Gum is made from gum base, polyvinly acetate, emulsifiers and sweeteners. Go google on polyvinly acetate cos I learnt it from a documentary. Children who eats too much gum is at high risk of hyperactivity. And there's a reason why you can't swallow gum. Seriously, don't swallow gum okay. Plus it can cause diarrhea if consumed in large amounts.

Frontal Lobe. A word I learned today.

Chunnie is driving me NUTS really. If you see a guy with prominent adam's apple, high cheek bones, luscious cherry lips and smiling eyes, please tell him that I love/adore him. But only if his name is Yoochun. I'm a fan, BIG fan. He's my favourite, BIG time.

Goodnight folks.

2009-01-14T07:21:00.000-08:00

I sometimes feel like I'm the son of the family. You know, the one that parents harbour high hopes on and resposibilities starts to fall on the shoulders. Despite that, I think it's worth it going through the process. Knowing that hopefully, I will turn into a better person in future.

I totally despise my new haircut.

Put Your Records On by Corinne Bailey Rae
Maybe sometimes, we've got it wrong, but it's alright
The more things seem to change, the more they stay the same
Oh, don't you hesitate

Maybe it's not your idea of starting 2009 with heartbreaks, unfortunate incidents, hardships and unhappiness. But you get as good as you give. I'm sure it's self explanatory. So cheer up people, don't be so hard on yourself.

2009-01-13T09:15:00.000-08:00

I'm feeling so much better. Thank you girls, for everything. Thanks for the support and unconditional love. Muacks!

In times like this, you should summon the courage to smile and wave cos you deserve it. You deserve even a little bit of happiness for taking up the challenge God serve upon you. And I miss the boys ohsomuch. They're on major haitus, hope they're having fun.

2008-12-30T11:21:00.000-08:00

SBS Gayo Daejun 2008 was awesome. I like the thought that the boys were showing off some kickass attitude and being rebellious through their performance. It's like a bitch slap given to the Youth Association for banning Mirotic. Firstly, Micky made it clear that not even the Youth Association can teach/tell them what's good and what's not. Secondly, they sang 'Under My Skin' instead of 'Under My Sky' which I think sounds good though. Lastly, they showed what's really under their skin by stripping at the end of the song. Hell yeah!

I'm sure you won't understand any of that but just bare with it okay.

Currently I'm stuck with If We Were A Movie by Miley Cyrus. I simply can't find the acoustic version of it. So the lyrics are abit cliche but I'm loving it. She's like freaking 16 years old and she sure did some good stuffs. I'm not a fan of hers and I don't hate her either.

So yeah I miss my girls

2008-12-29T13:19:00.000-08:00

I'm really, really frickle minded.

I think I've dedicated myself towards work long enough. Well at least I'm able to make it till the end, almost actually. I've decided to call it quits, considering that school's gonna start in April. But since I've got a plan laid out, I managed to persuade myself into continuing with work, only this time it will be less hours. And I really mean less. I'm sure that I'm gonna miss work. Not the workload, pressure, politics and what not, obviously. Just that certain things about work make it enjoyable even if you have to look cool under pressure. Omg, I sound like an adult!

You know, sometimes work life makes me feel like I've lost my youth haha. Okay that's the limit. I have heard enough of politics, company policies and customers' nonsense. I think I deserve a break. It won't be long before I start hearing lectures, teacher's advices and the bustling of students rushing into lectures hall. Just the thought of it, makes me worry. But I'm sure I'll be able to handle it, well not so soon that is. And I really hope for the best.

Okay, moving on. I was having lunch with Wahab and Fahmi when we had this random conversation about relationships. It wasn't awkward cos afterall, it is Wahab and Fahmi. Apparently, Wahab found someone he likes and I know he does. Haha all the best okay! So Wahab mentioned something about certain boys. And here's what he said,

Wahab: Some boys like to have fun but they need someone to assure and look out for them at the same time.
Adhah: Well I guess so.
Wahab: Unless you're prepared to get hurt then don't get involved.

Actually our conversation wasn't so bad afterall. It takes time to understand the opposite gender. Well not really. Cos at times I can't even understand Mama and Papa! Okay, where's the link here? I'm gonna turn in already. Goodnight folks.

2008-12-07T12:33:00.001-08:00

Bryan is cracking me up! I will never forget this face like ever. Anyway I owe him 10 Curry Os for this. Fret not, I won't give you those Curry Os haha! The reason I asked him to snap this cos he reminds me of Junsu. Blame him as he keeps showing me his puppy eyes and acting cute infront of me. So that's when I thought he looked like Junsu. Go Bryan :D And please try to act your age sometimes heh. Well apparently Fahmi made me watch A Walk To Remember. So yeah we did, with earpiece on and sweet popcorn. Did watch it once though. I was sitted next to him while tears run down my cheeks and stuffing my mouth with popcorn. He was like 'Must hear the song!' to emphasize how sad that scene was. But at the end of the movie, he called me a crybaby. And the other side of it was he once confessed that he too cried watching this, irony.

Syaza Nur Ishak, hwaiting! I may not know what you're going through right now but I'm sure you can overcome it. I have this habit of dedicating DBSK songs to you even though you're not a fan haha. But anyway, listen to Step by Step. I hope it's positive lyrics and rhythm will perk you up a little :D P.S Micky looks hot in Step by Step PV!

2008-12-02T12:27:00.000-08:00

Many thanks and love to those who sent wishes, presents on my birthday. Thank you for making my birthday a blissful one, may yours be a more blissful one too. I really didn't have the chance to extend my gratitude to all so here it is. Once again, thanks love!

Have you realised how fast time really flies? The next thing you know, we're moving on to 2009. A whole new year, a whole new ups and downs. It gets pretty scary to sit and look back at all the things that have passed by. It send the chills down my spine. To take every mistake as a learning point is not very easy afterall. To accept others mistakes, is not an easy task either. One who hasn't tasted bitterness, cannot accept sweetness.

Yoochun is a person with multi personalities, so many faces, lots of weird hairstyles and fashion. He has too many strong and weak points as a person and an artist that I guess without too much love, one cannot be his fan. Well he got a big heart and I love him. (taken from soompi)

That must be the sweetest thing I ever read, that a person can say to another person. In addition, that particular comment made me realise 'to each his own' has a really deep meaning. Being a fan is not a crime, certainly nothing to be shameful of. Here goes my final say;
I'm a DBSK fan and Micky Yoochun is my favourite member.

Papa was discharged today. I've never seen him this sick before. I guess since he's been taking care of his two girls all his lives, it's our turn to show some concern for our old man. Please help Papa recover soon, especially his hand after the surgery. He needs his strength back and mobility for him to continue work. But maybe this can be a good, long rest for him from his hectic life at work. Anyways, he needs to recover.

2008-11-15T09:47:00.000-08:00

I cried buckets too.
Not being calculative, but I cried buckets too.

:'(

2008-11-14T03:14:00.000-08:00

As you can see there's a major lack of updates.

There's so much to say but as always, I'm lost for words. Or perhaps I just refuse to update. Haha irony. Anyway, I keep telling myself to think happy thoughts cos I had enough of being troubled and unhappy. But everyone has their soft spot and so do I. I wish I'm Superman, yes I wish.

Happy 17th Birthday!

Saranghae ♥

Jalan Cinta by Sherina
Nothing beats a meanigful song after a cry or two.

2008-11-02T09:25:00.000-08:00

I need to learn to sleep early. Cos the price to pay for 'burning midnight oil' is very, very risky. I ended up being ridiculously rebellious when Mama, Papa and Adeq woke me up this morning. Yes, it took all three of them to get me out of bed. Finally I gave in after hearing Mama's angry voice and a glimpse of her unsastified expression. I was extremely sleepy, I had to doze off in the office. The weather's pretty good, that's why. But Caramel Ice Blended from Coffee Bean do wonders. I was wide awake after gulping down a regular. Maybe it's just the psychology as I told myself that I'll be awake once I drink coffee, yucks.

Finish up a few of my shopping list right after work. Now what's left to be done is keep my guilty-pleasure ATM card as far as possible from me. I'm slightly better than my big spender days haha. I'm working on it people, I'm working. But I just can't deny the pleasure of getting those things in my hands. Ohwell, it's never too late to learn to be wiser in handling money. Hwaiting!

Eh I miss Fahmi, where the hell is he? That annoying bugger. Hope he shows himself at work tomorrow. Another reason to attend work other than seeing Aunty! If you're quite a chatterbox, the person you should turn to is Wahab. Cool shit, he's the most interesting person in nEbO that I know. Keep talking dude, keep talking. Aight, I'll make a move now.

2008-11-01T13:36:00.000-07:00

So yeah life hasn't always been easy. As always, it's safer to not put your guards down just in case a terrible setback might appear out of nowhere. Well that's life, it happens when you expect the least of it. The positive thing is you can always look back and reflect to be a better person. But otherwise, once it stings, it really hurts.

I'm sure only God and oneself can really understand everything that we feel, our thoughts and the things that we've been throught. Not easy, definitely not easy. However life goes on and that's that. To all, I pray for your happiness always.

I bet everyone must be busy living their lives. Well same here. Exams are nearly over, which is something I'm elated about. Work has been such an asshole. With a hell lot of new staffs in the office, it just gets worst. I can't deny that the atmosphere has definitely change for the better since Rosanne and the others left. But busting my ass for this shit, is seriously nerve racking. I hate the fact that there's evil and good though I understand why God created it that way.
Maybe I should just give in yeah.

And to add salt to the wound, I encountered a couple of insertsname customers that deserve a good bitch slap from me. Serious shit, customers are not always right. Read people, double read. It's really annoying please. Try managing the office when your head is laid on the table, everytime shit happens. Try facing customers like you despite being shouted at etc. Argh simply outrageous. Well what's the point of crying over spilled milk?

I've decided to change my url, please relink if necessary.

Goodnight.

2008-10-12T07:15:00.000-07:00

I realise every time I went missing, I'll come back with a new skin.

So the reason for my absence was I'm currently having the hardest time in my life. Haha not to sound so serious but I was down with fever for the whole week. It's very annoying but a blessing at the same time. I get to spend the week at home, lying on the sofa watching KBS World. But the glitch is I was devastatingly weak, my throat hurts and my temperature kept rising. Of course there's tons of medicine to swallow. And believe it or not, the medical fees can cost me up to 50 bucks!

Now I'm back to work with alot of my dear colleagues leaving the company. Right people, thanks for leaving me and Aunty alone to die! Haha don't matter, I know both of us can survive very well. Betol tak Aunty? :D I'm thankful that there's no longer two shifts but who wants to work till 10pm.

I need food, pronto!

2008-09-29T23:28:00.000-07:00

Haha I'm having fun right now but I shall update cos Rosanne ask me to :D Okay I think that's all for today. Sweet and simple, since Rosanne doesn't like too much words. Ms Rosanne Poh, happy? And yeah, curse Fahmi for making himself absent for work frequently. Kahirul Fahmi Bam, you better come to work this week!

Here's for Emilia. Thank you for intorducing DBSK to me, I'll never forget you okay?! Takecare of yourself, text me aight. Plus here's to Syaza and Naila for always being the ones.

Saranghae, don't ever change ♥

I'm highly anticipating Hari Raya, you feel me?

2008-09-29T00:38:00.000-07:00

Here's for Emilia. Thank you for intorducing DBSK to me, I'll never forget you okay?! Haha takecare of yourself, text me aight. Plus here's to Syaza and Naila for always being the ones.

Saranghae, don't ever change ♥

I'm highly anticipating Hari Raya, you feel me?

2008-09-18T02:56:00.000-07:00

This is how Khairul Fahmi & I are at work.
I swear we were rolling on the floor laughing all the time.

I was having a conversation with a friend yesterday at work. That was then I realised how much I've grown up and I could feel the difference. I'm not ashamed to say this cos I believe there will be a point of time in my life that I will gain from my past experiences. It's a good feeling. Not being proud but mainly thankful and glad. This reminds me for not being oblivious about the things that actually mattered in life. And this reminds me too, a little shoutout for this friend. Hey dude, thank you for opening up to me, really appreciate that. I might not know exactly what you are going through. But the least I can do is that you should be strong to overcome any obstacles that comes through. Like I said, it may be a blessing in disguise. So fret not, shit happens all the time. And basically it's up to you to make it all better or rub it in the fact that you're feeling miserable. Takecare of yourself, dude.

2008-09-14T00:22:00.000-07:00

I'm feeling very lethargic, my shoulders are very tense. I'm lacking of proper sleep. Cos I have this tendancy to watch the telly till late night. Or just hog on the lappy for hours. So yeah, it's partly my fault too. Besides the fact that I think I have insomnia haha.

This is crazy, really. Exams starts next month and I'm the least scared. Actually I'm worried cos I don't think I've practiced hard enough. Hopefully I'm mentally prepared and honestly, I'm not. Okay O's are coming, serious shit!

There are things in life that make you detest at the slight mention of it. There are also things in life that make your heart jump of joy at the slight thought of it. Life is all about balance. Everything seems to come in twos. Correct me if I'm wrong but that's how I feel.

There's absolutely nothing wrong with Malays working with Chinese and vice versa. Whether you like it or not, this country is filled with people of different races/colours. Nobody's forcing you to like each other but at least respect each other as a human being. Yes, human being. Multi-racial, remember?

Joke of the day.
Wahab: Hi I'm Abdul Wahab from Abdul Wahab

If you think that your society is unfair to you,
what about hers?

If you think you are unhappy,
look at them.

If you think study is a burden,
how about her?

2008-09-10T20:15:00.000-07:00

Hello. I'm Khairul Fahmi BAM! again. For the second time, Raudhah let me blog in her blog:) All I have to say is that Raudhah is B to the E to the L to the O o o! Well, back to counter. Adhah's already screaming at me. And...I love nEbO, period! . _ .`

2008-09-10T06:50:00.000-07:00

I'll be right back.

2008-09-06T11:13:00.000-07:00

Considering that I haven't been updating, I guess I'm back for abit.

Ramadhan is here and I'm enjoying every single moment of it. Especially the part when I have to control my vulgarities usage. I'm disappointed at the fact that I have to break fast out of home very often this year. And tuition's making it harder for me to actually be at home. Well I think it's worth the disappointment cos I slogged myself for a good reason, for me and my future.

These days, I kept emphasizing that patience is virtue. Apparently that's reality. How many people, really, have the ability to tolerate and go through everyday life without any complains? But one thing I believe, there's one kind of species that has an extraordinary patience planted in them. And they are called Mothers.

I wish I could continue but my body and mind says otherwise. My head is spinning and my eyes are extremely heavy. I need some sleep, like seriously. Till next time, goodnight.

Muker aku stoppit.

2008-08-26T02:34:00.000-07:00

Hi, my name is Khairul Fahmi! =) Do you know who am I? I don't know you either. I don't even know why I'm updating this blog. Oh one more thing, Raudhah is crazy! Period!

editted

Sumpah, that was Khair. He begged me to allow him to update my blog. He's been cracking me up alot today at work. Thank you! I wish he was here to crack me up again. Cos seriously I feel like shit right now. To think that this problem will never have an ending. I miss Vio, I'm so glad that I'll be seeing her tomorrow. When I talk to her, my problems dissolve. Goodnight.

check them out.

2008-08-25T02:34:00.000-07:00

Micky yoochun pls? racism
1)the prejudice that members of one race are intrinsically superior to members of other races
2)discriminatory or abusive behavior towards members of another race

I am greatly thankful that racial riots don't occur in Singapore today.

However even now, I can see that racism still exist. When you're in school, the situation is different, everybody gets along well. Once you enter working life, it gets pretty nasty and unpleasant. Just the thought that it's actually happening is already a bad sign. To see it happening to the people I care about, really hurts and what hurts the most is that I'm in no position to change the things that happened.

There's so much that I can do cos basically, I know where I stand. But sitting back and watching others taking the heat really isn't making me comfortable. Even if I don't know who I am yet, at least I know who I'm not. News flash, racism is really old fashion and not to mention, childish.

Haha Khair, you can't stop me.

khair (F) says:
alarrr
khair (F) says:
fine
lemondrops says:
whatever pink panther
khair (F) says:
haha stop it sey raudhah
khair (F) says:
lame ~
lemondrops says:
as you wish jellyfish
lemondrops says:
haha!
khair (F) says:
haha irritating sey
lemondrops says:
whatever pink panther
khair (F) says:
8-)

2008-08-21T19:44:00.001-07:00

Mood: Fucking bored
Working sucks when you're actually out of work pay-ing.

I get really frustrated when I lost the flow of thoughts to blog whenever I click the NEW POSTS tab. I simply stare at the blank page meaninglessly whilst my mind find the right words to convey what I intended to earlier. I bet this must be the aftermath of no-school-period. Well I strongly believe that school's a place to discipline. Even though I wasn't one of the obedient students in school, erm class.

Speaking of class, guess who I bummed into last night? Miss Azlina! Oh I was elated to see her after for sucha long time. She looks good, still with her recognised smile. I just wished I took the initiative to walk up to her and actually start a conversation instead of a simple hello. But anyway, it's the thought that counts cos apparently I was rushing, okay not really.

Teuku Wisnu is coming to Singapore on the very same date I plan to hit Baybeats with friends. Thanks eh! And apparently, my 37 year old Mother was more estatic than I am.

Mama: Later on that day I wanna shake hands with him.
Me: Ah, I also want but I got plans already.
Mama: Uh then don't go lah, I go with Papa and Qistina.
Me: I want to hug him!
Mama: Eh me too! (laughing while hitting my shoulder)

I decided that this year's colour for first day of Aidilfitri will be red. Shockingly everyone agreed cos whenever I suggested a colour for the past years, my suggestion was ignored. Now for the second time, everyone listens to me. Or issit?

2008-08-19T02:13:00.001-07:00

I was reading the news over at Yahoo Singapore this morning. One of them were reviews on Singapore's performance during the Olympics. Alot of contraversies about the representatives of Singapore in the Olympic games. Then I started to wonder about foregin talent. Once I studied that Singapore welcome foregin talent to boost our economy in many ways. However that's not the case. If the goverment bought over foreign talent to represent the country to win medals for the country, it will question the local talent's ability.

I'm disappointed at the fact that our local talents are not well recognised in our own country, being to be sports, music or arts. Some of my friends with amazing music capabilities are struggling to pursue their dreams. Putting aside the age factor, there's no age limit to pursue what you want. However, the timing might not be perfect just yet. Now the main point is, little is done to encourage local talent to develop in its own country.

Maybe there's improvement going on currently, and I hope it continues.

I was reading one of the polls at internet about why foreigners come to Singapore. According to majority, it's all about business and making money. Sucha pity that our country is known to be a place just to make money. Personally, I find it quite true. Cos we don't really focus on areas such as entertaiment. It's really obvious. Look how many terminals of airport are there in Singapore. Not to mention the upcoming casino and fyi, there's a giant ferris wheel at Marina. However, perhaps it's whats best for the country and the people, aye?

OMG, I sound fucking political.

2008-08-10T02:05:00.000-07:00

Fuck it cos the paragraphs that I typed out
DISAPPEARED!

On a brighter note, this video made it all better.
EMI, MUST SERIOUSLY WATCH THIS~

2008-08-09T20:55:00.000-07:00

Should I just say, Happy National Day?

I'm not always patriotic but I guess acknowledging Singapore on her 43 years of independance wouldn't hurt. Besides I've been a Singaporean my whole life, its the least I could do. Reds a nice colour though. I would love to watch the fireworks this year but time constraint is making it impossible. Furthermore, I don't wish to brush through the mass of eager Singaporeans at Esplanade again. It's bloody annoying, really.

nEbO staffs are required to wear red today. Maybe required is a strong word, encourage will it be then. But right now, only Boss and I are the ones wearing red. Amy is tempted to buy a red top since she doesn't own any haha. I hope when the rest arrives, they're in red too.

Goodness gracious, I feel like I'm in a club right now. The songs blasted are ridiculously unusual, Idk why today they played techno and trance. Since it's National Day, why not National day songs? I wanna hear Orang Singapura!

Seriously, the music is making me sick.

2008-08-06T04:08:00.000-07:00

I seriously dread searching for a new skin. The very reason I like to use blogger's template. But I guess this time my eyes crave for something new to see. Since I can't find something that I really really like, I decided to use this instead. I love the colours.

AJ told me an info about fast food that changed my perception of it, thanks AJ!

M&E meeting on Sunday went smoothly with alot of fun. But it wasn't even easy to get there. Anyways we had lots of laughter and we enjoyed ourselves! Had lunch cum dinner with the band once we're done. Decided on pool-ing after filling our hungry tummies. Dhyl and I were the lousy ones on the pool table. However the guys were really supportive haha. Great sportsmanship was displayed right?! And no matter how bad I can be, I saved Qas's dying slipper. Headed home after an hour of pool. We practically filled the bus with noise and laughters :D We were playing silly games on our ride home. Qas made us laughed our intestine out when he came out with his sitting strategy. Sungguh tak sopan tau!

Khair's joining nEbO next week and I swear I was overjoyed once I heard the news. Yeah! I handed application forms to Sweetheart earlier. Hopefully, he'll made through the interview. Another reason to look forward to actually attend work if he made it. Here's something I need to tell. I love Violeta Pereira something-something haha. You rock, don't ever change!

Guess who's working on 9th August? Yours truly.

2008-07-30T08:51:00.000-07:00

In this world, there are bound to have things that's beyond your imagination. It doesn't even matter if it's a small or huge issue. In this world, we are commonly caught in situations where we really don't have the power to change it. It can be hard to let it pass by or even turn a deaf ear. The point is, what's its worth? Sure it might hurt your pride a little but again, what's its worth? People make silly mistakes unknowingly every single day. So heck what they say. If they have a problem with you, then the problem lies in them. Just be yourself.

EMI, MUST WATCH THIS! (if you haven't watch)

2008-07-25T23:06:00.000-07:00

Micky, hwaiting!

My body is aching, I'm feeling rather lethargic.
I have an appreciation dinner later on. Everybody will be there. I'm happy at the thought that I will be meeting the band! Guys, I miss you. I hope everything goes well. As eager I am about it, I have this tinge feeling of laziness. Not the laziness to attend the dinner but the laziness to go through the dinner while having the discussion. I better be off before I sprout any more nonsense. P.S I have a new member in the family, her name is Hyundai Avante

2008-07-20T03:54:00.000-07:00

I wish it would be less complex.
I wish this matter would never prolong this far.
I wish I wasn't invovle in this at all.
I wish I knew the simplest way out.
I wish I could turn a deaf ear and rest my case.

2008-07-18T00:26:00.000-07:00

Thanks Micky, for making my day.
What's not to love?

2008-07-16T03:08:00.000-07:00

Hug by DBSK (English Version)
Hero: Once I say I love you, I think you would be gone oh baby.

Cause we're too young to love, so I can say later on.

Hold you in my arms.

Micky: But I will be waiting for you to say you want me to be with you.

I'll live in your love in your dream forever, and ever. Ohhh

Hero: Whenever you look in my eyes, there are so many smiles and tears.

I was born to love feel so deep inside.

If you need me, I'll be your man.

All: I'll be your man

Xiah: Whenever you look in my eyes, I don't want to show you my love.

I'll make up my mind make your dreams come true.

Nobody can stop me to say, I love you.

Max: How can I ask you girl? Still, I'm looking for other words.

Oh baby Since love seems to make me blind I try to find all day long but I can't at all.

U-Know: We talk on the phone every night and so came closer day by day.

I touch you and kiss you then hold you to feel but in dream.

Micky: Whenever you look in my eyes,

Xiah: there are so many smiles and tears.

Micky: I was born to love feel so deep inside,

Xiah: If you need me I'll be your man.

All: I'll be your man

Max: Whenever you look in my eyes, I don't want to show you my love.

I'll make up my mind make your dreams come true.

Nobody can stop me to say.

Xiah: I love you.

Max: In my arms, in my soul, I want to hold you baby. Y

ou don't know how much I love you. Do you baby?

Hero: Like the sun rising up. I can't stop loving you, can't hold back any more.

Max: Whenever you look in my eyes.

There are so many smiles and tears.

Xiah: I was born to love feel so deep inside.

If you need me I'll be your man.

All: I'll be your man

Hero: Whenever you look in my eyes,

Xiah: in my eyes

Hero: I don't want to show you my love.

I'll make up my mind make your dreams come true.

Nobody can stop me to say I love you.

I may be at my lowest but I always try my best to make me feel better.

P.S This very much reminds me of Ji Hye.

I wish you all the happiness in the world, takecare Ji Hye.

2008-07-13T03:25:00.000-07:00

Making full use of the office's webcam!

My girls at nEbO are experiencing boy trouble. I don't know what I can do for you girls. But you know yourself better so do what's best for you. No boy could let you down thus pull yourself together. I know it's hard but don't stop trying. In time to come, I bet you will be happy as you are. Everyone deserves to be happy even when they are hurt. Abit of relaxing really helps! Plus you've got a whole bunch of punks in the office to share your feelings or troubles. Cheer up, girls.

I'm cranky when I'm hungry, not a pretty sight.

2008-07-12T01:21:00.000-07:00

I seriously need to pee.

They look good then, but so much better now.

If a red balloon
Flies in the sky
My heart remembers beautiful memories

2008-07-10T05:03:00.000-07:00

Birthday Bash's over, I'm delighted and relieved. I don't feel the need to elaborate anything much about the event. Except for I've worked fucking hard for it and I take it as a success. Organising a company event isn't as simple. I learnt a handful of lessons, very meningful ones. Thanks to those who made this event a blast. I fucking enjoyed myself during the party!

Ed's serving his National Service. He came by the office to give us a note each. Although he self-proclaimed to be handsome, I think he is. Cos he is fucking cool. Goodbye handsome Ed. You look cooler with bald hair heh. P.S I don't know why he drew that cartoon for me.

I love Emilia for introducing DBSK to me!
Dong Bang Shin Ki featuring
Micky Yoochun, U-know Yunho, Hero Jae Joong, Xiah Junsu & Max Changmin

I promise to post more photos of DBSK ^^

2008-07-07T00:05:00.000-07:00

I'LL BE RIGHT BACK,

THANKS.

2008-06-27T19:19:00.000-07:00

Box 1, Disc 6
Sumpah I feel like a walking zombie. Mama and I went bonkers yesterday night. We had Cinta Fitri marathon the entire night till morning. I had a good, loud laugh while Mama was sobbing away. I started watching it at Sensasi only at the 60th episode. So now I'm watching from scratch! Mind you. There's a total of 8 boxes with 16 discs in each box. I'm in the midst of purchasing Box 2. I'm bloody sure Mama will support me haha! Had 2 hours of sleep before I took off to work at 10am. I'm pretty confident I will bloody hell sleep during work. I retaliate when parents woke me up. Cos you know what, that's the most evil thing to do. To add to the torment, I'm experiencing abdominal pains. Fucking painful can. I want to cry. Eating doesn't solve the problem. Anyway, work's ending soon and then it's Night Safari! Cheerios.

2008-06-23T23:08:00.000-07:00

Next Saturday is the big day!

The last time I felt this shagged would be when I'm on a mission to climb Mount Ophir. Despite performing no vigorous physical activities, I felt the need to just sit, lay my head down and rest. I don't want to complain this time, yes I'm a whiner. I just get tired of it sometimes. My eyes are barely open right now, as if gigantic, heavy elephants are napping on my eyelids. But there's still lots of work to be done. Did I just complained? I think I just contradicted myself.

Just a statement, dark circles are starting to loom under my eyes. And darker circles will appear soon if I continue being in this position. Plus I need to watch my diet. I want to avoid the naggings from Papa about my junk food intake!

Serious shit, I've got no mood to work right now. I've been yawning like a hippo. Yes, I'm sleepy. No, I'm not stress. I'm just in the mood to enjoy haha. The arcade would be nice or maybe a movie. Bloody hell, I'm stuck in the office. I'd rather watch Edmond making a fool of himself, while immitating as a rock star. I'd rather talk soccer with Lin Feng at the counter. And I'd rather gossip with Nadzirah. But both Lin Feng and Nadzirah are off today. And that Edmond, busy doing God-knows-what. I think I'm bored, bored to atheletics haha.

SYAZA! HUDA! COME SAVE ME QUICK PLS!

Teuku Wisnu, who else?

2008-06-16T01:54:00.000-07:00

Haven't you hurt me enough?

Your silence, no the word is ignorance, it's killing me. Maybe that's your whole idea isn't it? Giving me a glimpse of hope and crushing it as well. Congrats, you've succeeded. I'm debilitated being in this situation. Well I don't have to worry about you, wouldn't I? Cos probably you're enjoying all the company you have right now. You never change, never. Or have you turned into the worst. If you want to continue this bizarre thing, be my guest please. But for goodness sake, cut me some slack. I don't wish to play games anymore.

You always quit what you've started. You jump right out of it, leaving me to figure out what the hell happened and I'm just dumb enough to use up my braincells, my energy, my whole heart to come to a bloody conclusion. What exactly do you want from me? Please lay it on the line. Who's playing with who's feelings now? You demand three reasons from me, I gave it to you. Now I demand one honest answer from you. My question is what in God's name do you want? Will you give me an answer? Or you're gonna act like a funk again and say you had enough for one night, making me look like the idiot who committed the crime.

My subtle signs are not for show and tell. It meant something, something deep. Perhaps something you would never understand. I'm tired of always defending you, I'm tired of putting my feelings aside all the time. When is this ever gonna end? I wish you knew what I went through, I wish. Right now if you ask me, I feel worst than worst.

Apart from being miserably miserable, I had my happy moments. It was unplanned outing. On Saturday night, I phoned these lovelies for a movie date after work at 7.30pm. We caught the 11.50pm show of Shaolin Girl and it was hilarious. Though the ending was kinda cocky, the whole movie was worth watching. Japanese girls are yummy, that if you minus of the glitters and the I'm-cute-can't-you-see girlish poses. Right after the movie, went down to Orchid Bowl to meet Kak Lala for awhile. It's 2 in the morning, the bowling alley was packed with people. Oh I hate crowds! Hang out and walked home.

I'm physically sick plus exhausted. Work is really stressful. To add on to my stress, I received my entry proof last night. Currently, I'm organizing a birthday bash for my company. Basically everything is screwed up. And I need to study! I'm worried over too many things, I feel white hair emerging out of my scalp. I can't have a long off from work due to the stupid contract. And I'm so whiny!

2008-06-09T02:04:00.000-07:00

I'm finally back, I miss my killedthetruth.blogspot.com

I'm getting the hang of those keypads, they can get annoying.

I've got so much to talk about. New updates. I've got my haircut last Wednesday from Toni&Guy. I love the outcome cos Mel did a splendid job. Bye-bye to the curls and hello straight hair. Now I'm anxiously waiting for it to grow. I've got my hair highlighted too. My headphones are disappointing me. I barely use them for a week and the left side had to died on me. The best part is, I accidentally threw the warranty card. What a bummer.

After work on Saturday, the family went to Popeyes for dinner. The adults were practically licking their fingers! We had our hungry stomachs filled before touring around the three terminals. We took the skytrain and were always fighting for the seats. Haha. Head home after that. Papa need specs cos he's experiencing night blindness when driving. He'll look weird with specs on!

There are always boundaries in everything we say or do. When boys get to know girls, what are the rules? Cos the only rule I know would be being yourself. When you try to impress, it might just backfire. But if you start a conversation by asking 'hey, what's your bra size' then you need to get that brain checked. Don't start by arguing about being open minded. That's sick. Flexibility in one thoughts don't necessarily need to be judged. If he calls that being himself, he needs to find someone which is his cup of tea. It's sucha turn off, period. What's with these boys. Haven't they grown up yet?

I'm stuck with David Cook's-Always Be My Baby. I don't know why I didn't like it before. After drowning myself into it countless times, I gathered that I love it. And hell yeah, he deserves to be crowned American Idol. He says I ain't gonna cry no, And I won't beg you to stay, If you're determined to leave girl, I will not stand in your way, But inevitably you'll be back again, Cos you know in your heart babe, Our love will never end no.

2008-05-28T09:24:00.000-07:00

During work, I surfed the net for some news. And I came across a rather disappointing news. Humanitarians over at disasters zone are sexually abusing children in exchange for food, money and shelter. What in the world has happened to this world? Frankly, they should feel ashamed of themselves. Evidently they don't deserve to be called humans, let alone humanitarians. Sexually abusing innocent children who are going through an ordeal, who they should be protecting. What the fuck were they thinking?! The state this children are in have already displayed grief and basically these heartless humanitarians are adding salt to their wounds. Isn't there enough damage done to this vulnerable children? Sinners, that's what they are. They should bury themselves with their dirty sins and rot in hell for good.

Today I had to train Chew Yan, new part timer. I need full dosage of Millie, she's been away for too long. I need her to come back, pronto! Last minute roadshow held tomorrow, thanks eh. The last thing I need right now would be a roadshow. Another two consecutive off days, nothing feels more appreciative than this. Time to spend time with my girls and shop as the Great Singapore Sale is here! I feel very comfortable with Elicia around. Plus plus, Vio makes me happy like hell yeah.

Bought dinner for the family after work. Had dinner with Papa and Qistina over Duyung. Sumpah the mermaid looked damn real, Jimmy looks aneroxic. Eventually everyone else went to bed except for me who is currently blogging while MTV is on. But right now, bloody hell I need to sleep badly.

Every morning at 8am, I never fail to catch Cinta Fitri :D

2008-05-27T04:37:00.000-07:00

WARNING: Read this entry at your own risk.

I declare today the fuckest day in my life. Even if that doesn't make sense, I don't fucking care. This working life is getting out of hand. I'd rather practice the holy FYS than bloody hell being here. It sucha a big risk on my studies but yet I'm still shelved here. The only reason I'm little reluctant to fling a fucking termination letter of my contract is cos I want to prove to him that I fucking put my whole heart in working. Just cos I cried doesn't mean I'm weak. If I'm weak, I'll jolly well wash my hands off this shit instantly. If this is what you call pride, then so be it. It's substantiating my ability and sincerity in working here. I'm here to gain experience, at the sametime prepare myself to be independant financially. Not to taper my self-esteem and capability of doing things with my own efforts. This is ridiculously ridiculous. Everyone here in this commitment deserves a break. Which sentence in my contract fucking state that I can't even apply off to go for a holiday with my family? Isn't that outrageous? Bloody hell say without me you still can run this place but disapprove of my request to have off days. Yes, sometimes I make mistakes even small ones. But people are learning everyday. I can't possibly learn not to repeat a mistake without committing it. This is fucking frustrating. I sacrifice time, sleep and energy here but what I get in return is exceedingly unfair. I'm not expecting anything cos I'm paid to work but this is just too much. Everything also kena fuck! (SCREAMS!)

A big big shout out to my colleagues. Thank you for being around whenever shit happens, thank you for giving me confidence to do my work, even if you all didn't realise it. You guys are the best! I wish you all the happiness in the world, no matter how fucked up things can get. Those who are leaving soon, I'll miss you. Muacks!

2008-05-22T04:14:00.000-07:00

Went shopping yesterday. Mostly my morning was spent sleeping, obviously. Waited for Qistina to finish her Napha test before heading to airport. Yasmin took off to Melbourne last night. It reminded me of my primary 5 days, the exchange program at Japan. Had Popeye for dinner cum lunch cum breakfast! Mummy sent us to E!hub for our movie after that.

I'm having migranes, it irritates me.

I'm pretty sure you have heard this; Manchester United won. Haha the minute Ryan saw me during work, he promptly high-five me as he walked past. Lin Feng was overexcited already, very funny. Cristiano Ronaldo scores, even though he missed the penalty kick. I texted Papa about the scores, he gave the malas-nak-layan reply haha. Guan Zhong won 40 bucks from betting Home Utd vs Gombak last night. Haha he faked his NRIC when collecting his cash. Omg, my friends are gamblers!

Ayat-Ayat Cinta was awesome. I really loved it till the last second. I cried throughout the whole movie. It really touches your heart and reached out to your soul. I felt that the actors and actresses really played their character well. This movie is highly recommended. This might sound bias, but Fedi Nuril is good looking! Told you I have this thing for Indonesian actors. Am planning to catch Ayat-Ayat Cinta for the 2nd time.

Millie oh Millie! (points to girl on the right)

2008-05-19T00:52:00.001-07:00

I'm sorry, really sorry. I didn't mean to neglect you. You know deep down inside I want to be there for you no matter what happens. Please takecare of yourself. Don't give me the cold shoulder, I can't handle that. Don't be mad at me. I'll try my best to ensure this incident won't repeat in future. But one thing for sure, with no doubts, I miss you too.

Now I'm feeling guilty all over again.

I'm stuck in a place called work, on a public holiday. But basically there's nothing much to do either. Yesterday was a great day. Went to the movies after work with Violeta aka Vio. Afterall, the theater is situated right beside nEbO City. Made of Honor, at last I've watched it! Though the ending was predictable, I still loved it. Next movie will be Ayat-Ayat Cinta.

Took a picture of Millie, Chai Sia, Elicia and myself on Saturday at the counter. There's like zero customers on that day. The day was simply dreadful. So we were forced to snap photos after gossiping about boys and such became history for the day. Since I looked horribly horrible with fat cheeks, I decided not to post it haha :D

End of the month is crawling soon. Which means pay day! I can't wait, I can't wait. This week's schedule rocks. You know why, cos I have 2 off days and that's heaven. On the contrary, madrasah exams on Friday. But on a lighter note, Friday's last day of madrasah before the holiday starts. Cool or what.

edited post
I pee'ed nearly five times during work earlier. Why nearly five you might ask? Cos for the 5th time, I endured my bladder until I reached home. I'll blame Edmond for that. He forced me to drink the last thousands of drops in the water dispenser. Haha he acted like a jerk today. Ryan couldn't stop making me laugh till my stomach hurts. The best part was, I almost choked on the pearl I was chewing!

I need book therapy, pronto. I miss burying my head in an interesting book, analyzing each sentence by reading between the lines while enjoying the story at the same time. Reading is a habit, I couldn't get away with it. Decided to hit the library before work tomorrow. But it all depends on what time I rise in the morning.

2008-05-16T08:13:00.000-07:00

I'm learning to spend wisely, I feel content with that. Cos when you start to earn money by yourself, spending that money would be an issue. Work has taught me alot lately. Even when I feel that every minute I spent working was a regret, I turned to the lessons I gathered. As much as I can, I'll try to be positive about work. A wise person will make the best of everything even if it means sacrificing :D

I think I deserve an applause for taking my medicines regularly haha! Hey, it's an achievement for me. I can't stand another doctor nagging at me for failing to complete my medicines. The last I heard was from a CGH neurologist, that was bad enough. I'm excited to meet Dr Wong next week! (susah dapat tau ni)

I was reading the papers and my heart really sank. Every single day people are dying. Correction, people found dead. So many things are happening in the world, I don't even know where to start. Have you ever had this feeling that you still have a long way to go but somehow life seems short? I think I have. Innocent lives taken, homes destroyed and God knows better. Reading news like this brings more fear of death. Death is a subject nobody likes to talk about. But it affects everyone. I wish I could help these people. Dear Allah, please open the doors of Myanmar's government hearts in welcoming help from UN. And give the people in China enough strength to go through this ordeal.

On the record, I'm starting to have this thing for Indonesian actors. I find them attractive. Like I always say, their faces are calm, cool and collected :D Maybe having an Indon boyfriend would be interesting haha. But I'll need time to keep up though.

Goodness gracious, I miss my girls so much!

2008-05-13T07:57:00.000-07:00

The pulse on my left calf turned out to be an infection. That causes it to be swollen and painful. It has spread on a small portion on my calf. Dr Wong prescribed me a medicated soap that smells like Listerine. And a bottle of iodine that smells like chlorine. Worst of all, antibiotics! Mother of calamity, save me from this medicine madness.

Next Wednesday I have an appointment with Dr Wong. He asked me to find time to swim cos of my backaches. At 17, I already have these problems. But I thank Allah for giving me the strength to carry on with my daily lives. Some people might not even have the opportunity to wake up after their sleep. From today onwards, I will try to make effort to remain healthy. Nevertheless, actions speak louder than words.

Roadshow at NP tomorrow. Roadshows have never been my favourite. Not to mention the pressure and all. Besides, with my condition, I don't wish to stand for long hours. The swollen might just get worst. But I guess 5 hours would fly by soon enough.

Great news! Papa passed his driving tests after 3 consecutive failures. Omg, I'm so proud of him. The girls were overjoyed, of course. I think he was too excited that he said, 'Okay this year raya takyah naik bus lagi!' Haha, confident lah seh. I don't think we'll get a car anytime soon.

P.S I want to be skinny (HAHA!)

2008-05-11T02:41:00.000-07:00

I feel sick and exhausted.

Ryan chased me away from work even before my shift ended. He claimed that I looked like I was going to die. I insisted on staying but he convinced me to go home. So I went home with heavy legs, not that I feel bad for knocking off early though. I had difficulties walking cos my right calf's swollen, it hurts real bad. I must have looked like an idiot, limping my way through the sidewalk while heading home earlier.

I might turn parsimonious with my time cos I never realise the degree of importance of time till today. Juggling takes alot of practice. And that's the game I'm not good at. Maybe some of you can but I can't. I'm learning to but I find myself slower than a tortoise. I don't want to turn into someone faineant just cos I can't manage my time wisely. What a bummer.

In addition, I've been so busy with work that I've been neglecting many important things. My studies, especially. My friends would come next and last would be myself. I would be drained once I arrive home from work. My brain juices and energy seemed to be used up at work too. I haven't been contacting my friends either. No outgoing calls/msgs due to late payment of phone bills. Guess why, cos my pay from last month is not in. I'm fucking frustrated.

That is why I've decided to terminate my contract. I can't go on like this. I'll be discussing this with Mama & Papa cos they know what's best for me. I'm still under probation so I guess the process won't be complicated. I must consider the company before making decisions. Afterall, I am a nEbOian. But on the other hand, they're too many part timers to fit in that office. Maybe one lesser person won't make much difference.

Robert Downey Jr aka Iron Man is definitely hot, despite being old.

P.S I want to be skinny (HAHA!)

2008-05-08T07:14:00.000-07:00

I'm sick of work, seriously. I know I'm contradicting. When I'm out of job, I complain about being out of job. When I got one, I complain about it. That's me for you. Remember I said how I regret making decisions sometimes? Now this is one of them. My intention to work is simply to earn some cash. But I didn't expect it to turn this way. I didn't expect to sacrifice time for myself, time to study and most importantly time with my family just for this bloody job. It's not what I had in mind. I'd rather remain out of cash than sacrificing all of that.

This teenage brain of mine is not ready to accept political issues, huge responsibilities that concerns in the commercial business and definitely not ready to risk myself for being the person I truly am. No doubt being in this job showed me things that I never encounter before, learning experiences I never know of. But I'm just not ready yet. I still need to figure myself out and excel in my studies as well as set a future. I'm still in a state in adolescence, I don't want to get involved in all this shit.

I'm sorry you have to read about how miserable my life is or how low my self-esteem is currently. If you don't like it, might as well scatter.

Despite whatever I just expressed earlier, I must be the most gratified girl in the world today. Since today's my day off, I decided take a breather away from work. Firstly, I did the housework and I can't believe how filthy the house is. Everyone is so busy with their own things that the cleanliness of the house was abandoned. Secondly, I spent my time with Naila like finally. We went gallivanting wherever our legs took us. I miss you, Naila. Had a great time with you, meet up soon again. Lastly, I met with dearest Muhd unexpectedly. He always completes my day. Even when I least expect it. Hell yeah, I love him for that.

I have to worry about work tomorrow. Plus my presentation for class. That is very unnecessary. But it's worth it cos as long as I know I had fun today, tomorrow's a different story. Oh boy, ranting can be pretty tiring. I need my sleep, goodnight.

2008-05-05T10:10:00.000-07:00

1. At what age do you wish to marry?
24 or 25 cos I can't decide.

2. How many children do you want?
Four would be nice, I always wanted four kids.

3. What you want the most now?
Hear him say 'Goodnight, baby'

4. What do you want to be when you grow up?
Wanted to be a teacher but changed my mind. I don't really know actually.

5. If you can have 1 more dream to come true, what would it be?
Take a trip to Old Tafford!

6. What are you afraid to lose now?
Myself. I'm paranoid enough to lose myself cos I'm almost at my lowest everyday.

7. Do you believe to be in love forever?
Nothing is forever.

8. If you meet someone you love, would you confess to him/her?
He already knows, no need for a confession. For the record, I'm straight. But to all my girlfriends, I love you very much.

9. How strong (in your heart) can you be?
Strong enough to have come this far, surprisingly.

10. What are the requirements that you wish from your other half?
He/She doesn't need any cos he/she already complete me.

11. Which type of people do you hate most?
Those who thinks that everything should go their way. And people who push me around.

12. Do you cherish every single one of your friendship?
Definitely! I tend to forget how bad some of them treated me. I don't dis my friends.

13. Do you believe in god?
Of course, the very reason I'm typing this here.

14. What do you think is the most important thing in your life?
Family cos they've known me all their lives. Not forgetting, happiness. Everyone deserves a tinge of happiness in them, deserves even a little bit of happiness in the world.

15. Roughly, how much of an age gap you want to have between you and your husband?
Not more than five, please.

16. What do your friend want to be like?
Superheroes, but always fail to.

17. What kind of friend do you want to be in your friend's eyes?
Responsible enough to have punctuality. And someone you can share his/her happiness as well as sadness with.

18. If you have a change, which part of your character would you like to change?
Habit of procrastination.

19. If you're feeling low one day, who would you go to?
Most of the time, I keep it to myself. Otherwise would be those I trust fully.

20. The most annoying judgement that people have about me?
I'm not unfriendly, serious. You just have to look a little bit deeper, darlings.

2008-05-04T10:04:00.000-07:00

It's been the longest winter without you
I didn't know where to turn to
See somehow I can't forget you
After all that we've been through

Going coming thought I heard a knock
Who's there no one
Thinking that I deserve it
Now I realise that I really didn't know
If you didn't notice you mean everything
Quickly I'm learning to love again
All I know is I'm gonna be okay

Chorus:
Thought I couldn't live without you
It's gonna hurt when it heals too
It'll all get better in time
And even though I really love you
I'm gonna smile cause I deserve to
It'll all get better in time

I couldn't turn on the TV
Without something there to remind me
Was it all that easy
To just put aside your feelings

If I'm dreaming don't wanna laugh
Hurt my feelings but that's the path
I believe in
And I know that time will heal it
If you didn't notice boy you meant everything
Quickly I'm learning to love again
All I know is I'm gonna be okay

Chorus:
Thought I couldn't live without you
It's gonna hurt when it heals too
It'll all get better in time
And even though I really love you
I'm gonna smile cause I deserve to
It'll all get better in time

Since there's no more you and me
It's time I let you go
So I can be free
And live my life how it should be
No matter how hard it is I'll be fine without you
Yes I will

Chorus:
Thought I couldn't live without you
It's gonna hurt when it heals too
It'll all get better in time
And even though I really love you
I'm gonna smile cause I deserve to
It'll all get better in time

2008-04-28T22:09:00.000-07:00

Current mood:

Took my precious time to reach work. Stopped at 7-Eleven to get Mars ice cream since the morning was scorching. Rayna welcomed me with a warm smile, as usual. Only to find Aunty walked out of work FOREVER after an argument with Rayna. I laughed upon hearing the story! But she left 57 envelopes without posting them on time. I volunteered to post them at White Sands. Imagine, walking under the hot sun with 57 envelopes in my hands. After delivering them, I decided to grab some books from the library before heading back to office. Haha!

I've got two new colleagues, Ryan and Rosanne. I'm still the youngest among the 4 of us. Ryan and Rosanne didn't even believe I'm 17. Do I look that old?! For real, he's 22yrs old. Rosanne's 20 and Rayna's 19. That leaves me the youngest right. Time flies real fast cos the next thing I knew, my watch read 5 o'clock. We had 18 membership today while the sales target was 49 per day. There goes Wayne, Raudhah this and Raudhah that. Can he like kindly shut his trap? Other than that, I had a great time at work. The feeling of having 4Rs around is priceless.

I have this hunch that something is wrong with me. Why you may ask? I sang while doing the dishes, while shitting in the bathroom, when I was bathing and while putting on my clothes. I can't remember the last time I sang so much. I feel guilty for not spending time with family cos of work. But I managed to eat dinner together at home. Mama got a new job that she finally is satisfied with. Everyone's happy for her.

Player of The Year, Cristiano Ronaldo
&Beel, sumpah kau takder resemblance of him!

2008-04-26T21:21:00.000-07:00

Current mood:

Today, I had the shock of my life.

I'm always thankful to have someone like Muhd to go through thick and thin with me. Despite the circumstances, he will be there to support me. He makes me feel that I am important and that noone has the bloody right to hurt me. He reminds me of the reason to laugh when I cried. He made sure that I smile again when I frowned. With him, lies the heart and soul of who I truly am. Nobody can replace him in my heart. I love him, and that's that.

I'm having aches all over my body. Skipped breakfast and lunch cos of work. Tomorrow will be another tedious day. Tomorrow will be another early morning. Somehow I dislike the way I'm treated by one of my superior. But he always know the right things to say after offending me. I bet he didn't even realise he offended me. If I'm gonna work alone without enough manpower tomorrow, I promise I will perform badly.

I met a new friend today, his name is Chris Brown and I like his dimple.

2008-04-25T22:29:00.000-07:00

Current mood:

When I was a kid, I had an accident in the bathroom. I wanted to reach for the mirror so I overturned the pail and climbed. As the floor was slippery, the pail toppled and I fell with a thud. My head banged on the edge of the sink, I was flat on the wet tiles. I didn't wish I would relive that tragic moment until today.

I can't give a concrete explanation for this. The situation gets really complex, that I was fed with lies and empty hopes time again. It felt like my already sore heart got pricked by a hot needle. It gets really frustrated sometimes. So frustrated that I could break into tears, so frustrated that I feel like running someone down with a bulldozer. Idk why but I'm giving myself another chance to see myself get hurt again.

I'm working tomorrow. Better yet, I have to train the new part-timers. In addition, there's some rehearsal nonsense going on, in preparation for Sunday's official opening. Is E-hub! sucha huge deal that PM Lee has to attend it? Most of you will gladly wait for weekends to come but right now, I'm yearning for it to end!

I didn't get into the wrong bus. The bus was just too fast for me.

2008-04-24T21:53:00.000-07:00

Work was suicidal. I can't remember the last time I felt drained from working. Working life is like a cycle. Except the fact that you get paid for going through them. Trying not to make mistakes during work is not easy. I'm prone to panic disease whenever I get cold feet. I overcome them by bitting my index finger and shaking my legs!

I'm not the strongest in sales but I guess I'm getting there slowly. At least I'm learning something. Pressure, and more pressure. Sometimes I feel like I make wrong decisions all the time. It's hard not to complain cos swallowing everything is alot harder.

One thing I hated would be being pushed around. Trust me. I was always a treasurer for NCC camps. Once Mr Koh pushed the wrong button, I cried at the first day of camp. Next thing I knew, I was sobbing away with exBoyf consoling me over the phone. Another would be Chinese people whom I work for and don't respect me by speaking their language during meetings. I'm used to getting stuck in situations where either I'm the only Malay or the only girl. How lucky can I get.

Met my darling after work :D

My ears are ringing with doubts and I can't find a solution to stop them. They haunt me in my dreams and snap reality away from me. I don't like them, they're not my friends. I think a dreamless, good night's sleep will do the trick. It will worn off my tiredness.

I promise I will treat myself to Pizza Hut.

2008-04-22T22:03:00.000-07:00

I look like shit.

Current mood:
I wish I was: Rock climbing in OBS 2yrs ago

Life can never be happier, as if. I've been busy with work that I can't conclude whether I'm happy or not. It's not a simple task. Yet again, being in a state of denial isn't the happiest moment. What a waste of life. Well I definitely have to turn those into actions. How unruly the mind can get. It's when logic collides with sentiment. I need a break, from myself. Get a grip of yourself, Adhah.

Haizad Imran is gorgeous! I couldn't remember where I've seen him before. Then I remembered, he's from Singapore Idol. He do wonders in both singing and acting. Couldn't you agree more?

I'm working this weekend, Sunday. Twelve hours straight, 11am to 11pm. I can already imagine how fatigue I will get. With bustling of people eager for the official opening of E-hub! at Downtown East. So people, do drop by this Sunday. PM Lee is coming, not like it's a huge deal but yeah.

2008-04-17T13:15:00.000-07:00

Suddenly I wish all of this is a fucking lie.

I don't deserve this. I don't deserve to cry for the mistakes I didn't commit. I don't deserve to be treated like this. But truth to be told, I already did.

Mother of calamity please, life needs to get better. I'm tired of being so negative. I'm tired of keeping it cool when its not. I'm tired of sucking it all alone. Simply put, I'm just tired. I bet a breather won't hurt as much.

End this misery, somebody make me feel better.

2008-04-14T03:46:00.000-07:00

The nothing-else-matters-but-me List:

I'm not any Tom, Dick & Harry or the third person, I wish.
I feel like garbage.
I want to let my feelings flow freely without making me feel like I have the 'I'm the Loser' sign on my forehead.
I'm officially sad, again.
Maybe I don't need Nina or Muhd right now, perhaps I just need myself.

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